and this is probably the happiest I’ve ever been in my life. Crazy I know, but I truly feel like my life is actually starting to take some direction.

On the 4th I celebrated my 37th *GASP* birthday. I remember a time in my life where I could never imagine myself this old and here I am.  Strangely though, I don’t feel like the decrepit dinosaur of a person I always pictures someone this age being.

So many wonderful things going on in my life these days. My Mom has been in good health lately, hoping that continues. Cullen and I have our annual trip to San Diego coming up. We leave on the 21st and don’t return until the 28th, this will be the longest trip we’ve made to San Diego and I can’t wait. If we are ever financially able to move, that’s where I’ll go. I absolutely cannot get enough. This year we’re rooming with another couple that have come to be some of my most favorite people in the world, so I’m very excited about that too.

Things are progressing with the adoption.  We’re still waiting to get an update on Jackson and/or our Seeking Confirmation Letter from China.  I’m growing more and more anxious, I know my son’s sweet little face, now I want to know him. I’m hungry for any new info China would be gracious enough to share with us until we can finally hold our sweet baby boy in our arms.  I continue to pray that soon we’ll be surprised with an update or even better, our SCL.

I’m going through a phase in my life where I’m clearing out clutter.  Many of my friends have told me I’m “nesting”.  Which is kind of a cool feeling. I found myself over the weekend with this huge desire to clean clutter out of the house. We’re getting ready to have a garage sale. In the past I would have puttered around until it was just too late to get anything done.  This time, I just went to town, threw away things I knew we didn’t need or knew were junk, am giving away items I think someone else specificially could use and the rest is being sold. I can’t wait. 

I have decided as of today to rejoin Weight Watchers.  I had much success on the program last year.  Dropped 40 pounds and felt on top of the world, somewhere along the way, as with every weight loss attempt in my life, I lost my way. Gave up, started eating crap again.  Ended up putting almost half of what I lost back on.  So here I sit, still miserable, fat and disgusted with myself. I have to do better, not only for myself but for my husband and my son.  They  deserve that at the very least. So I am starting over.  I’m not going to look back and be angry at my mess ups, I’m not going to wallow in the shoulda, woulda, coulda’s. I’m looking forward.  It’s the only way to go.